Letters of Shame

What am I? I thought as I stared down at my hand, now covered in words written in permanent ink. Cruel words—written all over my hands— stabbing me in the heart like knives. This can’t be who I am, I thought. Lazy, slow, fat, short, stupid, weak every word stung with fresh pain when I looked at it. Insult after insult, crawling up my fingers and over my knuckles like ugly insects. Oh, God, no. This can’t be who I am. Where had the prayer come from? How had God come into this? God didn’t belong here, with this hand, covered in my brokenness. I was on the floor, crushed beneath the weight of the letters on my hand. What am I, God? This isn’t who you are, Becca. I blinked at the soft whisper over my heart. That writing isn’t you. That writing is what they think of you. It isn’t what defines you. I will tell you what you are. In Christ, you are My child—loved and treasured. Replace those words with My words, Becca. All that matters is what I think and say of you. Because I know you. And I love you. “Okay, God,” I said with sobs. “But it’s so hard. These words won’t just go away.” By My power, they can. Slowly and painfully, they will leave as you replace them with My words. It won’t be easy. But I will help you. I will remind you. I will love you. I looked again at the words, feeling their hot sting. NO MORE. “What God says is all that matters,” I said. I picked up a red marker from the floor. I opened my hand and, right over my palm, wrote the words, YOU SAY. The red ink, like Christ’s blood, covered some of the letters of shame on my hand. Peace settled over me. And while I knew it wouldn’t be easy, little by little, the poison of the words of shame would give way to the peace of the red letters representing what God thought of me. I would let His words guard me from the sting of lies. God would define me. I am what He says I am. • Rebecca Roskamp • What are your letters of shame? Reread today’s Bible verses. In Christ, how does God see and define you? • How can you use God’s definition of you to replace the lies of your letters of shame? O Lord, You have searched me and known me. Psalm 139:1 (NKJV)

Read Verses:

John 1:12; 2 Corinthians 5:17; Galatians 2:20; 1 Peter 2:9